Dear Willie: I am with my boyfriend for four months now – not too long – but before my boyfriend I was in love with another guy but never told him about it.
Now the guy I was in love with before I was with my boyfriend, now talking to me and want to have a relationship with me. But I am in love with my boyfriend and I am in love with the guy.
What do I do? It’s really complicated.
Dear Miss: I do not believe it is possible to be in love with two persons at the same time.
Re-examine the words: “in love”. It doesn’t just mean loving someone; being in love means falling head over heels with someone. The butterfly-in-the-stomach feeling. The need to always have this person around. The guts to never betray this person no matter what.
If you’re in love with your boyfriend why are you entertaining this other guy? If you’re in love, cheating or lusting another person just doesn’t happen.
I believe you have a crush somewhere, but you’re not in love my dear. A crush could last for two years, but most times it lasts very short-term, like a couple weeks or months.
Ask yourself: What do I like about my boyfriend? What do I like about this other guy?
By the tone of this letter, you sound very young. Seems like the high school kids are reading Willie more than I thought (smile).
Based on your tone, I believe you do not know what love is, or how true love feels. I do not believe you’re ready for a serious relationship.
If you do insist you’re ready to settle down, concentrate on your boyfriend and tell the “other guy” to take a hike in a nice way. No communication unless it is quick but respectable pleasantries in public.
When you focus on one person at a time then you will eventually realise whom you really want to be with.
Willie
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